Your Mother-In-Law

Oh, boy, there she is - your fiance's mother.  She seems to come in two types: generous and kind, or bossy and demanding.  Here are a few things to keep in mind when you are dealing with your mother-in-law to be:


First, remember that your actions, and hers, are going to set the tone for your relationship for the rest of your lives.  It's true - if you marry her son, she will always be a part of your life, like it or not.  So it's in everyone's best interests for you to get along. 
     When you marry a man, you get his family, too.  Maybe you love his mother but dislike his aunt.  Well, you get her, too.  A marriage really is the joining of two families.  I was reminded of this recently when all the women in the family got together for a 50th birthday party, complete with ugly sweaters (for fun!) and bingo (for even more fun!).  One of the guests was my aunt's sister-in-law.  She's not blood related, but she's part of the family now, and we treat her as such.
     I think it's important to keep in mind that your mother-in-law is just as important as your mother.  Her son is getting married, and she'd most likely want to be part of the day, so think of ways that you can include her - ask her opinion on something like cake or flowers; ask her to attend one of your gown fittings; ask if you can include something from her wedding in yours - for example, carry one of her handkerchiefs or use her cake knife.  Include her in your bridal showers.  Keep her in the wedding loop.

     If she is pushy and insists on you doing or having things you don't want, be gentle in your rebuttal.  Thank her for her ideas or offers, but be kind and polite as you turn her down.  A good rule of thumb is to "blow sunshine up her skirt" before you turn something down.  For example, she offers her hideous, 1980's veil for you to use.  Gently say something like "Gosh, I'm so flattered that you would offer something so precious to you, but I think I've decided on a veil that really compliments my dress.".

So, keeping in mind that your mother-in-law will probably be your children's grandmother, that she is  very important to your finance, and that she'll be a big part of your life, treat her with respect, grace and gentleness and you'll have a stronger marriage for it.

Feeling stressed planning your wedding?  Looking for someone to handle the details on the big day?  Or just want someone there during the ceremony to make sure things run smooth?  I can help!  Contact me through this blog comments, via phone or text at 513.407.7165 or e-mail me at innobrations@yahoo.com. 

Also, I do more than plan weddings - check out my website at www.innobrations.com!